Any other women my age out there battling the thick, wiry, mutant, colorful whiskers of female middle age? Let's break it down:
- THICK - Know that "click" sound you hear when you cut wire with wire cutters? Yeah. That one.
- WIRY - They protrude straight out from the face - no smoothing along the skin. Straight. Out. Seriously, watch out for direct light on the chin.
- MUTANT - If I didn't have actual stuff to do during waking hours, I could WATCH THEM GROW. Seriously, desired hair cannot hold a candle to this hormone-enraged scourge.
- COLORFUL - My hair is brownish blond. I can genetically account for the red, although the red in my hair is just barely. But BLACK? What? Someone is going to have to help me understand this.
- Pluck? NO. Why? 1) too many; 2) EFFING hurts.
- Wax? Been there, done that. Never again. Why? EFFING hurts. Doesn't last. Hairs are thick enough that the ripping off of the wax feels like mass simultaneous plucking.
- Nair? Tried it. Doesn't touch them.
- Clipping? I guess this is it. At least 2, sometimes 3, times per week. Why? See #3 "MUTANT" above.
